LARRY
KING'S
PEOPLE |
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This week on
Larry King Live: |
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Monday:
Alan Greenspan |
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Tuesday:
Blacula |
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Wednesday:
Guy who thought "Pearl
Harbor" was a "total chick flick" |
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Thursday:
A Weeble |
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Friday:
JoAnne Worley |
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Congrats to
ABC
"World News Tonight" anchor Peter Jennings for finally passing
his G.E.D. test. I knew you could do it, buddy!...The so-called
"experts" think his cousin Scott is an acting legend, however I
consider Jimmy Baio the most talented member of his clan...My all-time
favorite dance continues to be "The Batusi"...Do middle-aged hags
still sit around drinking General Foods International Coffee and
sharing fantasies of swarthy Italian guys doing them?...I swear
I saw a jar with a hand in it next to the olives inside Christopher
Walken's refrigerator...If Rue McClanahan's doing the scratching,
I've got an itch...Build me a treehouse...I've looked at Judy Collins
from both sides now and she's still a dog...Did Skylab fall to Earth
yet?...Lily Tomlin's relentless stalking of former Buffalo Bills
head coach Marv Levy has friends concerned...The worst part of making
a lot of money (like me) is when the Rexall downtown refuses to
cash your paycheck...Dogs don't come any meaner than "Cujo"...How
come people in Brazil don't speak Brazilian?, Just asking,
gang...People who say "yeppers!" lose me right away...Until my local karaoke
bar adds "I Touch Myself" to the selections, I ain't singing...Wouldn't
we all be happier if February was wiped off the calendar year?...Most
folks favor his "Saturday Evening Post" covers, but I much prefer
Norman
Rockwell's erotic "slice-of-life" covers for "Screw"...Bill
Kurtis' recent A&E "Investigative Reports" piece about Michael
Palin's efforts to terrorize the world with a 20-story reanimated robot
of Edmund Muskie was spellbinding television...A chick in a tuxedo,
now that's hot!...Why doesn't Orville Redenbacker's "grandson" just
out himself already?...I truly believe that the Seventh Day Adventists
are trying to control our minds via Etch-A-Sketches...After George
Carlin was a guest on my CNN "Larry King Live" show, our studio
was infested with chiggers...If the late actor Donald Pleasance
ever shows up at your house wearing priest garb and warning you to "get
out!," you'd best heed his warning...Greek letters are all Greek
to me...If The Hudson Brothers couldn't stay together, do the rest
of us even have a chance?...Are top fashion models excused from having
to say "cheese" when they pose for pictures?...The whole internet thing
has gone too far!: Paramount is currently filming "Ebay: The
Movie". Robert Zemeckis is directing. Joey Bishop and
Chasity
Bono star...The former Shah of Iran tells me that
Jim Jones'
Kool-Aid parties are one of the few delights in hell...Whoever invented
pillaging is a genius!...Spotted: Catherine Deneuve buying
Pyrex
at a Wal-Mart in Columbus, Ohio...Among friends,
Paula
Zahn is known as "The Latex Queen"...Are you gonna finish those onion
rings?...You haven't lived until you've been in "The Lyons Den"
with Jeffrey Lyons...I hear that The Crocodile Hunter and
Joan
Kennedy are dating up a storm...Herblock's political cartoons
are a bona-fide hoot, but the man simply cannot draw...I beg to differ
with Darwin as per the evolving from apes thing. I think we came
from lemurs...Doesn't Anita Bryant make nipple rings suddenly fasionable?...Is
that Michael Flatley guy "The Lord of the Dance" or "The
Lord of the Rings"? I keep getting that mixed up...Kudos to the producers
of HBO's "Taxicab Confessions" for their recent
Peabody Award
win. |
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