LARRY
KING'S
PEOPLE |
| Back
to current column |
This week on
Larry King Live: |
 |
Monday:
Antonin Scalia |
 |
Tuesday:
Jack Scalia |
 |
Wednesday:
Ken |
 |
Thursday:
Larry Flynt |
 |
Friday:
Michigan J. Frog |
|
|
| In addition
to being one hell of a football prognosticator, Beano Cook is set
to turn the fashion world upside down with his line of designer corduroy
lingerie. One of my ex-wives tells me that they're so functional, so even
wears them in the day. Take that, Vera Wang (Sorry, gang; I'm still
nursing a grudge over a nasty barfight with the clothing maven several
moons back)... Am I alone in wondering what our new first lady, Laura
Bush, is like in the sack?...Whoever invented bartering is a genius...Memo
to the Anti-Christ: You're secret's safe with me (for now at least)...Those
two aunts on "Sabrina, the Teenaged Witch" are hot and that Sabrina
ain't exactly chopped liver, either...Chou Young Fat: What the hell
kind of name is that?...All of the pictures that hang in my home proudly
display the photos that came with the frame...It seems the older I get,
the gayer my glasses become...For no apparent reason, I've had a restraining
order taken out against baseball Hall of Famer Al Kaline...I miss
seeing David Steinberg on TV...Friends disagree with me, but I'm
convinced that former CBS newsman Harry Smith is not real, but a
cartoon character...I love using ashtrays as candy dishes. Take that, Heloise...I
hate books, but love the spines..."V.I. Warshawski" continues to
be Kathleen Turner's finest work to date...Falling asleep and never
waking up again is one of life's little downers...The Minnesota Twins
have signed me up as a utility infielder for this season. Of course, I'm
only trying the baseball thing so I can achieve my dream: To win an ESPY
Award...As a way of livening things up on my CNN "Larry King Live"
show, the suspenders are out and the nurse's smocks are in...What in the
hell is a bayou?...You take Robert Clary out of "Hogan's Heroes"
and the show doesn't work...Medic-Alert bracelets aren't just lifesavers;
they're damned stylish, too...I'm agnostic by nature, but if Rev. Ike
tells me there's a God, then there's a God...Do they they
still make Lowenbrau Beer? I need to know quick, because, for some
reason, I'm jonesing...My Gotham City spies tell me they've spotted The
Riddler out and about and he's replaced the question marks on his costume
with semicolons...If they ever build a Rock & Roll Hall of Fame on
the tiny Polynesian island of Tonga, The Jets will surely be charter
members...There's nothing quite like a good tongue-lashing...For Passover
this year, I'm abstaining from speaking in esperanto...If I ever become
dictator of Earth, the first thing I ban is refridgerator magnets. |
|
